For all of you fine folks out there who are looking to follow my sweet dating tips and ask that hot momma out by rap, here’s something to help, just fill in the blanks.
Yo babe my name is (Your name) and I want you to know that I’m really (Adjective that rhymes with your name).
I saw you out here looking really (Adjective 1) and i wanted to know if you would be (Pronoun that rhymes with Adjective 1).
Just say yes and here’s the (Noun 1) we’ll go on a date which’ll be just (Adjective that rhymes with Noun 1).
It’ll be (Adjective 2) just don’t be (Adjective that rhymes with Adjective 2) and we will have a very fine (Noun that rhymes with Adjective 2).
There you go! A simple four line rap that’ll get you covered in bitches in no time!
1) Give that bitch a smuppet, bitches love smuppets.
2) If that doesn’t work show off your amazing flash step skills by sticking a letter in their underwear.
3) If the letter goes unnoticed preform an intricate dance of the blade using your katana to woo that bitch like a fucking exotic bird of paradise.
4) If theyre too stunned by your handy work bring them back to reality and be blunt using a bitching rap to ask them out.
5) If you plan on making them dinner make sure to have plenty of doritos and orange flavored drinks available note that hot pockets make a great impression as well.
6) If you plan on taking them to the movies after dinner make sure its a horror film, whenever they freak out they’ll be clinging to you like sweat to a sumo.
7) If you do take them to the movies note that this is also a great opportunity to entertain your li’l bro while still getting your swag on.
8) When your little brother ruins the date by crying because the movie scared the shit out of him assure the smoking piece of ass you’re with that this is normal.
9) Show off your amazing parenting skills by calming the kid down, this will highly impress your date as well as take care of your bro.
10) Call for a cab to go home and proceed to have successful sloppy makeouts in the back seat while your bro makes friends with the cab driver up front.
Follow these tips and you’ll be covered in hos.