Don’t go crying to your mama. Go crying to your brother, because he’ll give you a good ass kicking and to be honest you probably really needed it for one reason or another.
When it’s your little brother’s best friend’s birthday be sure to send them 413 smuppets in congratulations.
Who’s it gonna be, who’s going to be follower 150? Who’s gonna be our Mewtwo?
Take a deep breath.
Shine bright like a diamond.
If you can impersonate famous people, use your skills wisely, and make them say things like, “Titty Sprinkles.”
When someone tells you, “I love you,” respond with anything but, “G’day.” That’s just a dick move.
If you just got put in the friendzone, take a step back and realize you just used the fucking term “friendzone,” and probably have a lot more problems than you think.
Finally made that magazine cover, used some lame ass website that wouldn’t give me the full thing but eh, oh well.
When you can’t sleep at night, stay away from the electronics, they will stimulate you in a way that keeps you awake, instead of tires you out. Instead try reading Cosbro Magazine, you know, the paper kind that we don’t actually put out.